No matter what else I try to do today, my feeble little brain won’t stop singing the song in the video above — “Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner” by Warren Zevon, shown here in his last public performance on The Late Show with David Letterman.

Of course, the lyrics I’m hearing today are not Warren’s. Instead, they’re about Roland Burris, and they go something like this:

Roland was an Orphan from Centralia, Illinois
Who wanted to go swimming with the other hoi polloi
His father hired a lawyer to desegregate the pool
But Roland swam without him; that no-show was uncool
He studied law in Hamburg, and banks in the Midwest
Got elected state comptroller, and with children he was blessed
Roland and Rolanda carry on their father’s name
But the former attorney general is not done seeking fame

Roland the Trail Blazer!
Roland the Trail Blazer!

He somehow got named senator by Rod Blagojevich
And showed up in rainy Washington; that’s when there was a hitch
Without the signed credentials no one’s ever gone in
But his legend’s already set in stone, is there any doubt he’ll win?

Roland “The Greatest,” Senate Trail Blazer!
Roland “The Greatest,” Senate Trail Blazer!
(Talkin’ about the man) …

Okay, so it’s not quite soup yet, but that’s what I’ve got so far.

I’m hoping that writing it out will help it go away.

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