Another Week: Number 170

The Classical World, by Robin Lane Fox

Ten years ago, I bought a hardcover book by Robin Lane Fox called The Classical World: An Epic History from Homer to Hadrian. I enjoyed his Pagans and Christians, but never got around to the newer book until now. I actually bought it again — this time on Kindle — rather than risk having the 676-page volume drop onto my face if I dozed off. Also, I like to highlight Kindle books, and the ability to consult a dictionary or Wikipedia are very useful for unfamiliar subjects.

I know virtually nothing about ancient Greece and Rome. There was a week in school about Doric, Ionic, and Corinthian columns — probably the same education Donald Trump got.

The Classical World offers a drone’s-eye overview. Fox begins with the misty origins of Homer’s epics, swings through tyrants, Sparta, Persian wars, democracy, Pericles, Athens, the Peloponnesian War, Socrates, Philip of Macedon, Alexander the Great, the beginnings of Rome, Hannibal, Pompey, Cicero, Julius Caesar, the shift from Republic to Empire, Antony and Cleopatra, blood sports, Christianity, and Pompeii — to name just a few highlights — ending with Hadrian.

It’s an enjoyable rundown that assumes some minimal familiarity with ancient history. Instead, I had Wikipedia, and required many detours there to appreciate some of Fox’s allusions. In all, his book took me two months to finish.

The things that struck me most were the similarities of politics then and now — free speech, oligarchy and aristocracy vs. democracy, invoking the gods in military campaigns, attacking nations and capturing their booty, parades and triumphal arches, the question of putting kings on trial, celebrity, mockery, satire, inscribing names on buildings, emergency executive orders, subversions of the constitution and the courts, questions of citizenship, the emperor’s Golden House and his 100-foot statue — these issues from 2,000 years ago read like this week’s news alerts.

Spectrum Internet out, AT&T Fiber in

I have been a Spectrum customer here for 20 years — and another 18 before that when we lived in Kenosha. Their service was pretty good, but very expensive. I was paying about $75 per month for what eventually became 600 Mbps. after they gratuitously upped the speed a couple of times.

But now, after years of waiting, AT&T has finally brought fiber to my block — with a better plan. The sent an offer in the mail, and while I couldn’t meet all the asterisks, I could get 300 Mbps for $35 per month the first year, and $55 thereafter.

300 Mbps is plenty fast for me, and I’ll save some money.

First, I called Spectrum to warn them I was planning to switch. The best they could offer me was a downgrade to 100 Mbps for $65 per month. In other words, “See ya.”

This week, I felt like a coal miner in my basement, which is cluttered with 20 years of detritus. I imagined where the new line would come in, moved the washer and dryer, and vacuumed spider webs from the floor joists. My recycling and garbage bins got filled to the top with dusty whatnots.

AT&T confirmed my appointment about seven times via web and email and phone and text before Carlos showed up Thursday right at the appointed hour. He’s a fellow Cubs fan.

I had calculated exactly right. He removed the old copper phone cable from the exterior of my house and dropped the thin new fiber line from a utility pole a couple backyards away, then worked his way to the existing hole at my living room baseboard, and added a small plastic box to my wall. The installation took three hours from hello to goodbye.

Only after this — when I called them to close my account — did Spectrum suddenly come up with better offers. Too late — and I had to wait 15 minutes in their local store for a rep to accept the cable modem I was returning.

‘No Kings’ day in Racine, Wisconsin

Saturday was the third No Kings day across America, and my second in Racine. Once again, we protestors lined the northwest corner of Highways 20 and 31 — our busiest intersection — and displayed our signs to the passing traffic. Our number reportedly increased from 2,000 to 2,500.

Back in October, I didn’t bring a sign. I just waved an American flag someone gave me.

This time, after discussing signs with my friend Wendy, I stayed up a little later on Friday night and constructed something printed on copy paper, affixed to poster board, then affixed to corrugated cardboard with a fabric handle.

Inspired by my recent reading, it read “FAILED CAESAR” in Trajan lettering, with a thumbs-down icon below. People who glanced at it seemed stumped.

We stood in the chilly wind for 90 minutes. Most cars passing honked in support, and a couple of drivers flipped hostile fingers.

I feel like this specific activity has run its course. Other events nationally had speakers and musicians, some marched together. We confronted motorists at a traffic signal. It felt perfunctory.

Hail, Caesar! (2016)

Googling “hail, Caesar” while researching my sign, I ran across a movie to watch with my mom on Saturday Night: Hail, Caesar! is a 2016 Coen brothers comedy that neither of us had seen. It has an 86 percent Tomatometer rating, and it’s streaming on Prime.

Instead of ancient Rome, though, it’s set in 1951 Hollywood, where “Capitol Pictures” is making a Biblical epic, a musical about naval enlistees, a synchronized-swimming spectacular, a Western, and a high-society drama.

George Clooney, Alden Ehrenreich, Ralph Fiennes, Scarlett Johansson, Frances McDormand, and Channing Tatum all appear. Josh Brolin stars as the studio’s fixer. Tilda Swinton plays twin gossip columnists.

The visuals are well-composed cinemascapes that wonderfully evoke the postwar period. The cast is outstanding, but its collective size limits the individual roles. The pace and the dialog are snappy, but not particularly funny.

The story an absurd let-down, like a convoluted dream someone recounts. It’s just an excuse to stage captivating scenes.

Overall, the movie was a watchable — but not satisfying — hour and 36 minutes.