I’m sitting in my kitchen waiting for Rod Zimmerman and Todd Cavanah of CBS Radio to phone and officially terminate my seven years of telecommuting employment with their company. Otherwise, it’s at least sunny outside and I would like to shower and maybe go for a walk.
There’s a loop your mind enters where it just keeps alternating between positive and negative scenarios. One minute you find yourself in a liberating new circumstance, with a whole new life of unknown potential at your feet, and the next minute your blood runs cold with the realization that you’re about to become roadkill, lying in the snowy gravel with a dumb expression on your face as the cars keep driving by.
For example, it struck me as I was filling up the feeder yesterday that we won’t be buying any more bird seed for a while. Sorry, Mr. and Mrs. Cardinal, but that stuff goes for about $13 per bag.
Meanwhile, I have been encouraged by the words of my family, as well as friends and Internet well-wishers. It is true that apparent catastrophes can open the door to bigger and better new opportunities — perhaps as much as 50 percent of the time, anyway.
Did I mention that I also do Web design work? Hey, contact me.
Somehow, I have to believe (that’s a don Juan-ism) that, if we play a role in creating the world and our own future in it, then the part where we toss our crystal ball back and forth between the one hand and the other hand is crucial.
If I can get really hokey for a moment (and you know I can), permit me to quote the verse which both opens and closes The Moody Blues album Days of Future Passed:
Cold hearted orb that rules the night
Removes the colours from our sight
Red is gray and yellow, white
But we decide which is right
And which is an illusion
A couple of times last night, I was startled awake by the sheer panic of the specters of foreclosure, credit card penalties, uninsured illnesses, and so on. But then I felt the warm arm of my wife gently hugging me back to sleep, and dissolving the fear.
I know a lot of people are facing these same fears these days, and it just seems like there’s a better chance of inventing creative solutions if you spend more time picturing those possibilities — and ignoring the monsters — than the other way around. At the very least, you’ll be in a more pleasant frame of mind until the monster throws you in the lake.
In the meantime, since I started this post, Rod and Todd phoned me and outlined my exit from CBS Radio via speakerphone. They volunteered that it is odd that neither of them know what I even look like. (Pause to consider that for a moment, dear Internet reader.)
They were very professional, and they apologized that my coworkers and I are being let go even though we did a good job.
They even quietly took it when I scolded them at the end for putting their faith in a brand-new and unproven ratings system instead of their own proven professionals. I told them that they seem like shadow boxers who are getting their asses kicked, and I told them that some people follow trends and other people set them.
“Good point,” said Todd, who will now try to engage a strong and vital listenership in 2009 by playing the hits of the 1980s.
Oh, well. That’s all I have right now — but be sure to read today’s Janet’s Planet post as well.
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